A Bum Experience on the Trail

Without making too big a deal out of it, I should write about today's mountain bike ride before common sense and good taste get the better of me. Once again the ride was under perfect conditions, including the ending: I was half lost, but as long as the trail was going downhill, it was getting closer to town. A couple friendly dogs were approaching from the other direction on the trail, happily wagging their tails, so I slowed down to make a bit of a fuss over them.

As I coasted and slowed over a small hump, what did I see but a female hiker quickly rising from a squat. She was pullin' everything up as fast as possible, but I had time to get quite an eye-full. Why the heck was she taking care of business right next to the trail, in an open spot!, instead of behind a juniper a few feet away on either side of the trail? 

She was an old hippie broad, in more ways than one. I wouldn't have minded to catch her a peein' if she were, say, European. Everybody knows how lax and casual they are over thar. (We've all seen a couple of their sicko movies.)

I had the presence of mind to do a couple things that were intended to help her save face. But who am I kidding. In the uni-sex, casual, perverted culture that we have today, she probably wasn't even embarrassed. I hope this experience is soon wiped from my memory.